[bloody kisses]: 558.Humanism - reality of the human mind.The Black of Thievery; the White of Victimhood - It's the Trick

What is it that makes beauty so enticing? It's so obsolete – such a defect – what enthralls you to pursue? To find – or want to find what produces that luminescence that sparks your interest, your mind set?

Could you imagine letting your eyes lock another’s as black, dark, emptiness enters their eyes, envelopes your gaze as though an ivy mapping out across enriched, yet dry soil, reaching for a grasp, a lick a your ankles. Some say when you die your life plays on a one sided screen across your eyes- a theory to consider is that maybe it’s not playing for the presented victim. Such an agonizing thought that one mans’ memories die in his last breath. Maybe instead it is expelled, played for the one who ended it all – the new victim inclined to hold past life.

Now imagine killing the same man night after night for one hundred and forty three nights, not quite reaching 150, too much over 100 – not a solid number - Watching the same intricate, enchanting process weave inside your own memory. Could you really imagine that constant variable of bland sweetness, just pulling you in…Reminding you of the black behind your rested eyelids, as well as the such that follows each foggy memory. That black is…then…

That is beauty, what makes it so sought after. Yes that is true beauty. The black – since black is the colour that combines everything into one. You don’t know, you don’t want to – that will then make you feel in control. You just want to be tricked, to be naïve. To not understand and watch the world and all its secrets play across another’s eyes – to project onto your own.

That is beauty. One victim after another. It’s life after all – what is there with the absence of obsolete functions – what is there without the comfort of defect? The bland white of nothing. Innocence – where’s the wonder?

Imagine killing yourself each night.

Find that you do. Each night as new ideas are found, new dreams, these birth a new man. You find yourself reborn each morning – the black is you. So find the black – your everything – just close your eyes – submerge. It’s just like magic.

[4/24/08]