[Depressed Writings of a Depraved Mind]: 591 (Top Index)

2006-11-05 Mister Saint: This piece moves well, but there are a few issues I'd like to discuss with you. ^_^

First off, and this is just a technical nitpick, it might do you better to move this piece to another page. The top index is usually just meant to be that, an index, and it might help the piece to be moved to a page that has its title.

As for the writing itself, it certainly accomplishes what it sets out to do, but it is in need of some grammar and spelling work. Some major mispellings (colloge, meloncholy, should be collage, melancholy, for example) could be corrected easily with a spellchecker, if you have one. Anyway, a purty good piece.