[Metal Tsubasa]: 95.The Tale of Dark Faries."So wrapped up"

Porsche couldn’t sleep. She felt bad about Tai giving her his bed, or for that matter, letting her stay in the apartment without paying rent. She tossed and turned in silence for quite sometime… until she heard something outside the door. Upon hearing this, she sat up in the bed, remaining completely quiet, hoping to hear more than the muffled jumble she had heard before.
There was a voice; it had to be Tai’s voice, and his guitar. Even though she couldn’t clearly understand what Tai was saying, it sounded beautiful, like what she had heard in the club earlier that same night. She had to hear what Tai was doing, it was much better than lying in bed awake.
Quietly, Porsche moved to the door and slowly opened it. Now she could hear it clearly and stopped dead where she was.
“I’m so wrapped up inside my head,” she heard Tai sing as he gently strummed his guitar. “I can’t find up, and I can’t find down. Am I right, or am I always wrong?”
Porsche closed her eyes and listened to Tai’s song. It was simple at the moment and Tai worked over the same lines, over and over, but Porsche loved everything she heard. Tai seemed so frustrated if it didn’t go exactly how he wanted it to, but Porsche could never say that any of it sounded bad.
Tai continued to strum the guitar as he sang, “Will you help me find my way out? I can’t find a light in this dark place. I’m drowning in my own confusion.”
There was silence then, but Porsche stayed as she had been, though she was rather disappointed that Tai had stopped.
“Do you sing?” Tai questioned, causing Porsche to stumble out of the door way.
In shock, Porsche turned to Tai, eyes wide. Slowly, she collected her thoughts and responded. “I don’t know,” she told him, “I’ve never tried.”
Again Tai strummed his guitar, but nothing came from his mouth. Porsche watched him, watched his fingers as they brushed over the guitar strings.
“You knew I was standing there?” Porsche finally questioned.
Tai nodded as he said, “Yeah, I heard the door open. After you live in a place as long as I’ve lived here, you know all the sounds.” He continued to strum on the guitar, possibly going over the words in his head.
Porsche sat down next to him on the couch and simply watched him brush his fingers over the strings. “I’m so wrapped up inside my head,” he began to sing again, now with a clearer, set tone. “I can’t find up, and I can’t find down. Am I right, or am I always wrong?”
Tai looked over at Porsche more than once while he sang, as if waiting for her to chime in. He played over it again and finally she joined in, halfway through.
“Will you help me find my way out?” she sang sweetly with Tai, her eyes closed, listening to the music. “I can’t find a light in the dark place. I’m drowning in my own confusion.”
The two played the song over and over again and the more they played, the bigger Tai’s smile got. Porsche saw it, and it made her happy to see him smile. Nonetheless, they sung a song about the darkness they were both lost in.
After about half an hour, Tai stopped and stood from the couch. “It’s getting late,” he said as he put his guitar back on its stand to the side of the couch, “you should get back to bed.”
Now she was finally somewhat sleep, but Porsche didn’t want to go back to Tai’s bed while he slept on the couch. She looked at Tai as she stood and said, “Let me take the couch Tai, it’s not fair that I have your bed.”
Tai smiled gently at Porsche, as if amused by her statement, which he possibly was. “It’s fair,” he told her plainly. “Don’t worry; I usually sleep on the couch anyway. So go to bed.”
It took quite a bit more coxing before Tai finally convinced Porsche to go to the bedroom; he almost had to force her. Nonetheless, she finally gave in and Tai collapsed on the couch in exhaustion. He had lied of course, but it didn’t matter, he was just fine sleeping on the couch.
Though he was tired, Tai went over the lyrics in his head. He had so many songs, but still he and his band were nothing. He didn’t have half as much time to wait as Caden, Shay and Losho, and even Porsche did, but he was still the most hesitant to push forward. Why?
Tai muttered the song quietly to himself as he stared up at the ceiling.
I’m so wrapped up inside my head
I can’t find up, and I can’t find down
Am I right, or am I always wrong?
Will you help me find my way out?
I can’t find a light in the dark place
I’m drowning in my own confusion.

Perhaps the reason why he couldn’t let the band move forward was because he wanted the words to mean something. Words are only words, especially when they’re sung. How could he make what meant so much to him mean so much to those who heard it?
Tai rolled over onto his side with a sigh. His head faced the back of the couch and his arms were crossed firmly over his chest. He was very tired, but still he couldn’t sleep. Tai’s chest was throbbing in pain, and no matter how he lay, Tai couldn’t get comfortable because of it. “Fuck,” he grumbled as he rolled over onto his other side. “Of course it would act up now…”
Porsche had done her own tossing and turning, until she finally realized she was tired. However, she figured that she would wake up quickly, still being somewhat restless. She closed her eyes, turned over and was fast asleep in seconds. By the time she opened her eyes again and looked over at Tai’s clock it was almost noon.
Slowly, she sat up on the bed and looked around. Everything was quiet, until she heard something outside the door; it was Tai again. She could vaguely hear him strumming on his guitar and singing those few lines that Porsche was sure she knew by heart now.
The sound as crisp and confidant now, clearly because Tai had found exactly how he wanted it to sound, and possibly because it was the middle of the day, and he didn’t have to worry about waking up neighbors. Even as sad as it sounded, Porsche couldn’t help but enjoy it. Tai wrote his song directly from his heart. However, when she thought about it that way, Porsche could see why Tai would cut himself.
“I’m so wrapped up inside my head,” Porsche heard from beyond the door. “I can’t find up and I can’t find down. Am I right, or am I always wrong? Will you help me find my way out? I can’t find a light in this dark place. I’m drowning in my own confusion.” She could hear it now, how lost and confused he was; she hadn’t realized it the night before, but now it was quite clear.