http://www.myspace.com/mirabilia 

Uhm, so yeah...stalling, but not quite. I really need to go to bed but I felt like typing. So how are y'alls? What's up in the head of my unknown buddies? Huh? *slams a coffee to fall into a slumber on the floor beside the chair*

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*drool*

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*sigh*

Okay, well night heh.

558.Creative Void (short stories & poems).I Thought I had Half a Pack, a Radio, but I'm In Hell

The Takes, The Frames

Today's specific updates.

Summer break, I might end up posting some of my pics and stuff from my very very crappy photography kick - I will be taking classes haha. I hope...

But also, I've been writing a lot too so expect more. I hope I'm not still lazy and actually post most of it haha.

*hugs*

"So what am I s'posed to be?
Grab your hand and come with me"

AA is for Quiters.

http://www.myspace.com/amphibiousassault

Oh and, apparently "replacing brakets" doesn't mean I'm getting the bottoms back on yet. Sunova...

Getting my bottom braces back on today. yay me! Soon I'll be able to close my mouth right again!!!

=/

www.myspace.com/dearjuliet

Just slightly crampy, putting together my Collections, AND reading the AWESOME Stephenie Meyer, her ner "The Host" only on page 180-something and frankly enjoying it. Give it a try ^.*

"You need to pull up those grades if you want to get into college though..."

Mom, I don't want to go to college...

"Well, you don't have to. You can always be a hooker or a prostitute."

I think she thought it was funny, but I heard the seriousness in her voice.

My sister's not going to college, she's going to beauty school. They didn't go to college. Is that why I have to?

I'm in the mouth of madness
With a tongue of poetry
I ate the spine of Atlas
Now the world is crushing me


Luff Otep

Updates -

myspace.com/dearjuliet

pure awesomeness man

a few ideas crossed my mind for this drabbles, but I made a choice because some didn't fit the limits

my house smells like lemon - we got that collar with the lemon POOFs to keep dogs from barking and one uhm...shock collar =/

my fav teacher is leaving to go to law school, wish her luck hehe

and the random movie of the year - lol I'll prolly have a few =P

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Ppoo1EJ-Vrc

for those of you who don't like NU Metal -

http://youtube.com/watch?v=s1R_txIuuio

hugs for all

I'll give you a few clips of the days throughout this week - thoughts, observations, actions...

(*) Dragging my ass, almost missing the bus twice in a row

(*) Bowers: "Going home early."

(*) Next three days - John, Jesse, Clint, me, "Where the hell is Bowers?"

(*) The feel of wanting to throw up because of all one person has done to you.

(*) Talent show ... pressured ... nothing thought through ... just momma ... three judges ... forgot lines ... dunno what I just said ... add libing to cover myself ... teacher took her sweater off as I was exiting, swung it over her head ... "I love you Leigh! Loved watching your sexy bod!" from my Lover, Chelece'.

(*) "You can use only hand written notes on the Applications of Science final exam"

(*) "How am I supposed to remember all the bones in the body? I don't even know how many there are!"

Mrs. B "I dunno, I'm not making the test, Mrs. Randolph is..."

(*) Cramming ... rewriting ... cramping ...

(*) Schlotzkeys...Degrassi...daddy being all too nice - I think he's worried...momma questioning my eating in a subtle way...

(*) Note : My sister's sick - from a boy. I don't want to know what all they've done.

(*) If I needed to, I could tell you the whole poem I was s'posed to recite, I don't know anything I ended up saying Thrusday night...

(*) Lies, lies, lies. If you're going to wear a discriminating symbol, you might as well stand up for it. Don't run away. Stop lying to me. Stop coming around me. Stop raising bile in my throat. Leave me alone. Don't call me.

(*) "Can you just not bring up me and you? Like...when you're talking to her?"

(*) "I think I might break up with him..."

(*) Thought : I thought y'all were broken up. No wonder I didn't hear it until he tried kissing me.

(*) Sonovabitch. I'm on that sickening mind roll again...




I'll be cramming for exams - sorry I won't be on much.

I think I've realized why I'm so anti-social in person.

Online I never had my parents wishing to be that perfect daughter, perfect at everything like my sister. Online I never had my sister suppressing all I wanted to say or do or be. Online I was encouraged to be me.

In person I have all the things weighing down on me telling me, "be who you are," but "only who we want you to be..."

How am I s'posed to work with that and pass school with straight a's, not go to parties with friends, not hang out with friends, be ragged on all day because I'm not normal, I'm not straight, I'm not all these things that people are so used to, accustomed to being right there and in reach.

And then because I'm different I have these people that steal from me and swipe from me all that I am, so now I'm lost and have no clue who do call Brandi and who to call Leigh. I don't know what's different, I don’t know boundary lines, I don't know...I just don't know.

So yeah...lovely me.

All those words that get choked down, they will come out somehow.

Life lies
Lies deceive
Love fights
Light is diseased.

What else is there to look forward to when you know you have nothing inside?


My love is granted to y'all anyways.

I spent my
whole life
In love with despair
Kept my lungs full
With the breath of thier
Mute atmosphere
I became
What I hate
And thus
Shall I remain
To give birth to a
Mighty assasin
Armed with a weapon of words
To defy the lies
To never compromise
No
Today
My name
Is pain
I stood
Beyond the world
Whispering secret syllables in the
Eyeless dark
Dancing wildly
Round and round on the rotting ground
Surrounded by the dead dusts of hell
This is how I delete myself
And this is how I corrupt
Everyone else


Otep Shamaya, man. She is a true, beautiful poet and artist.

Her song, "Suicide Trees"

I have summed my list of who I want to see live in concert down to three bands.

1) SLIPKNOT!
2) REEL BIG (fricken) FISH man!!!
3) LESS THAN JAKE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OMG. Slipknot especially.

Otep would be nice too...and Wicked Wisdom...

But those three ^.^

Random, yes...I know.

Hold on Beautiful - I feel a Tragedy

Poetry that I myself relate to.

558.Random Lyrics (from my song phase).Lying Is Fun Until It's All You Have Left

Oh, and as far as I've realized, although I don't know who Brandi is, though I do know who Leigh is, Brandi comes out often enough. All those blogs I write - when I'm under-limited - where I'm just saying stuff I've realised...they're ME. That's who I really am, the person I don't know anymore because I've tried to impress my parents so much, trying to be my sister. The real me, comes out when I don't even know what's going on half the time. That feeling where your head's goin to roll off your head from headbanging to Iron Maiden while youre with your parents with accessories...noticing how much they love each other and that I might just find a girl that makes me love her as much as she loves me. Although I don't know who I am, I guess this is a start.

As well as stepping up and realizing that guys need to stop using me because I don't WANT them.

I am beginning to focus more on my vampires and lesbians lately for some reason, if y'all don't want to read them, you prolly shouldn't read a lot of the stories I'm posting. Read the poems of course ! Those are staying the same ! ^.^

and mostly, their not the whole situation, their like...'clips' I guess you could call them?

*loves*

All added :::

558.So Called Life (suicide entries).Sirens Aren't the Perfect End To a Night

558.Passionate Ballads & Lore.Now Immortal, But By My Own

558.Passionate Ballads & Lore.From Thought, To Prose, To Wondorous Words

558.Creative Void (short stories & poems).Powerless : Air and Plot Thickened

558.Creative Void (short stories & poems).I Can't Live - So I'll Die Without

558.Passionate Ballads & Lore.I'll Forever Be

558.Humanism - reality of the human mind.Human Nature : Everyone Is

558.Humanism - reality of the human mind.The Gypsy's Symphony

558.Angelic Lyrics (love "Angel" poems).To Hell and Back In No Span of Days

558.Creative Void (short stories & poems).And Thy's Fear is Dubbed : Loneliness

558.Schizophrenic Shroud.Teary Eyed At Star Light

558.Random Lyrics (from my song phase).Heart Pumps a Toxic Taste

558.Vampire Souls (poems & short stories).Raining On the Worst Parade

558.Angelic Lyrics (love "Angel" poems).Therapy of the Gardens

558.Random Lyrics (from my song phase).Forged Hallucination

558.So Called Life (suicide entries).Real Estate

558.Creative Void (short stories & poems).Brass Knuckles On Broken Hearts

558.So Called Life (suicide entries).The Still Draws Nothing