I added my first writings in a really long time.

243.mousey's Poetry.eighteen is wild
243.mousey's Poetry.firearms and spitfires
243.mousey's Poetry.you're a good kisser,charlie brown
243.mousey's Poetry.smile, sisyphus lives

I'd love some feedback on them, I just realized it's been a year since I was really active. Sheesh. I really should get on here more often. The atmosphere is so good.

Sidenote, I've seen 40 movies since coming up here in August. I'm pretty impressed with myself.

I'm living in San Francisco now, and loving it. College is amazing.

Yesterday, we were walking around Haight, which I love, and I was taking pictures of everything, graffiti, buildings, people (covertly. I shoot from the hip). So, I mean, lots of homeless people. But that in and of itself doesn't phase me TOO much. I'm used to it. Lived near a city all my life, been in enough of them to get a little hardened to it. And San Francisco has it's own brand of the homeless, from what I can see. Lots of twenty-somethings, lots of dreadlocks, lots of pot, and lots of pride.

But we were waiting for our bus to get back to campus, and I see on the other side of the road this homeless kid, couldn't have been more than seventeen, probably more like fourteen, literally staggering down the sidewalk. Like, he looked like he was about to collapse right there on the street. He'd go a few steps, almost fall over, sort of plaintively accost someone, one hand out, one hand drawn up to his chest, give up, stagger a few more steps. It hurt me to watch, and our bus was pulling up exactly as I was seeing this, so I couldn't do anything about it. I kept watching while our bus pulled away, and then we turned a corner and I couldn't see him anymore.

So that's the bad part about living in a city. Sometimes it hurts you.

You know, Across the Universe was one of those good but disappointing movies. But their version of Come Together is HOT. I could loop it and not get bored for a looong time.

School starts in eight hours.

I miss summer already. This year's was particularly unsatisfying.

I have a close friend who at twelve years old wrote better than almost all the amateur writers I've ever met, online and off. Honestly. The kid could've taken college english courses in eighth or ninth grade. He wrote a hefty trilogy between the ages of eleven and thirteen. And if you read it, you'd see an experienced writer who certainly couldn't be below college age. A little overconfident, a little overly descriptive, but an undeniably good writer.

And by now he's got most of the kinks worked out, his style is wonderfully unique, and he's finally finding stories that are his and his alone, and not falling into the little traps he set for himself in his formative years. I love it. It's been so satisfying to watch this process of him going from an amazing, if rough, young novelist, to the still more amazing and much more graceful writer he is today.

We've swapped writing for three years now, and it's inspired me to write more and take more risks with my writing. He goes miles above and beyond my prose, but his poetry is still the kind I met him with: emotional and rough and full of feeling, and too much meter for free verse, not enough for any structure. :) So I try to surpass him in that area, and while we both have agreed that our little swaps don't literally help improve our writing, it's something we're both incredibly glad we've done. It's comforting and mildly helpful, in an amateurish sort of way, good for both of us.

I guess I look up to him a lot. I'm glad he's my friend.

I'm not sure where this all came from. We talked about his old writings today, that's probably it.

Plus, I get so sick of seeing the same old blogs every day! :)

I had a nice dream last night. It surprised me. But now I can’t stop thinking about it. Is that really what I want?

And now he’s on my mind again, which is probably good for me. I think it’s my first crush since Mark and I broke up, so it's this wonderful feeling of relief.

In less cryptic news, summer is here and I’m all the better for it. The job hunt is miserable, but I’m still filming regularly, writing a little, and seeing friends semi-frequently. And watching movies. Donnie Darko for the first time. My kind of movie.

But I need to write more. Spanier just started this creative writing club at school, and over the summer we’re supposed to write a bit so that we’ll have somewhere to start from when we get back. I want to start it early so I can bring a lot in to the first few meetings, get it all looked over. Get feedback. I mean, online is great, but it’s so satisfying to get an actual sheet of paper back with marks all over it.

I'm going to the LA Film Festival! You have no idea how excited I am! This past year has shown me exactly how much I love film and everything that goes into it, so to do this...I can't describe it. Brilliantly wonderful.

Plus I haven't gone to LA for a while. For living so close to it, wow. A while. :)

And I'm like twelve-hundred behind in my wordcount. Oh well! I'm HAPPY!

Oh, and if someone would look at this and see if my stanzas are in passable order I'd be quite appreciative. I looked at it long enough I wasn't sure anymore.

243.mousey's Poetry.Just Another Emo Poem

Don't worry. It's not my heart spilled out in blood, guts, and free verse. Although I can't promise that it's not stunningly bad.

Lots of exclamation points in this post. My apologies.

I guess no one else is doing script frenzy, which is really a shame. It's terribly fun, and I feel I'm becoming a better writer doing it, even though the point is just to spout words. It's a learning experience. But seriously, this is a writing community, we have members with ties to nanowrimo, and no one's doing it. You're missing out. :)

Anyone else doing Script Frenzy this month? It's like nanowrimo, but a script, and 20K words. Sounds like a lot of fun. I'm gonna try it without any planning. That was my nano strategy as well. Not that I got very far. :) But it felt wonderful!

I'm the only one online again. It's kinda fun. :)

I am the only person online. Sweet. Now I can wreak havoc to my heart's content.

Eh, maybe not. But I joined this place late enough that this hasn't happened to me before. :) Landmark!

Thank God Almighty, he took the best way he could have.

So, life is absurd, I've decided.

Just a couple days after writing a really explosive, tearful, and angry post on my blog, the main object of my rant visits my page. After being offline for around two years. Two. Years. When I first got the blog, I even tried to get him to start posting again, but he said that he had "left it for dead" because it had been so long. So what did I have to worry about? Only two of my friends knew about it besides him, and he'd never shown any interest in it before.

And then all of the sudden, I log on this morning and find that he has absolutely raided the place, probably read everything I ever posted on there. I just sat there and laughed, in half amused, half mortified, "oh, shit" sort of way. Yeah, I talked about him. A lot. He's my ex, and we're really good friends, but he just started dating someone else, and I had some things to get off my chest. And I was tired and angry, and everything I was thinking got blown out of preportion in the writing of it.

So I'm not really sure where we stand right now.

Oh, geez. Life is absurd.

Jordan and I went back and finished up our crime/noir-ish film for the festival. Our teacher will be happy. You know, it's shocking how much better a movie can become when the music, oh, doesn't have mistakes, and the lighting actually allows you to see what's going on!

Well, not that shocking. But it's still a wonderful change. Since we only got to run through the music once last time before turning in the final form, needless to say it was a bit sloppy in places, and this one shot was dark beyond all belief. But we re-shot and re-recorded, so it's all nice and shiny and finished now. Very satisfying.

But our comedy. Sigh. It's my baby now. The jokes still make me laugh, which is a good thing after staring at it for several hours on several different occassions. I'm really in love with the characters Mark and Matt play, especially Matt's. His is a complete Eyore-type personality. Did I spell that right? Eyore? Eeyore? I'm not sure. Oh well. Anyway, it's fun to watch him act. He's awfully good, especially for having no training at all. Mark is great too. Very high-strung. :)

Am I boring anyone? All this incessant talk of film class? I'll shut up if you want me too. Or at least talk quieter.

I keep looking at the Latest Blog Entries, and no one's posted anything for a while, so this is for all you folks who check it as often as I do. :)

Spring break is almost over. Noooo! But thankfully the movie we're working on for Film is nearing completion. Well, not really, but we've only got one shot left to shoot (not even a scene, a SHOT), and then we've got to dive into editing. But that's not going to be nearly as tricky as last time. For one thing, we all know how to work Final Cut by now (as opposed to just me knowing how to work it, so I had to do it all), and for another we haven't got any voice overs to do, which is just pure relief. Last time, out of our three-character movie two of them spoke entirely through voice overs. And we hadn't decided who would do one of the voices. And we left all that until the final weekend to do. Go us. But this time, our movie is constructed far better, we've finished shooting quite early, and we'll probably get a couple more weeks to edit. Maybe even three. Plenty of time!

So, that's it for now. Hope that satisfies anyone who keeps hoping for a new blog posting. :) Maybe I'm the only one...

He's dating her now, and I think I'm fine with it. I mean, I should be after six months. Besides, matt is looking awfully cute now. Isn't that funny? I'm trying to force myself to have a crush on him, partially because he's a sweet guy, and partially to keep my mind off the the new couple. The group has this cyclical thing it does, where everyone hooks up over a six month period, breaks up for six months, and starts over. Last year I started it, this year barbara did. We're so weird. :)

I'm turning into a musical theater geek. It's wonderful! All the stories and songs are floating around in my head, and I recently discovered that there are pirated videos all over youtube of musicals. So, needless to say, my homework has taken a back seat to Les Mis, Tic Tic Boom, Assassins, and The Last Five Years. My dad keeps rolling his eyes when he hears me humming. He nows what I'm turning into. :) Thanks goes out to all my friends who introduced me to this stuff. And I'd like to thank the academy...

To whoever nominated my writing, thanks so much, I'm honored. I did a complete double-take when I logged in. :)

So, M gave me a mix from different musicals for christmas, and I've been listening to stuff from Wicked, the Last Five Years, Assassins, and others, and it's just wonderful. :) I need to see more musicals.

So, I haven't been on in a while. And I haven't entered a contest in forever. I don't want to say that I'm losing interest in this place, because I adore the community and the people, but life is so BIG right now; there are always a thousand choices of what to do at any given moment, and this choice never turns up in my mind. Maybe with summer coming I'll get on more. I'll try.

So I go into history today, and my writer friend is there with this silly grin on his face and an aboslutely enormous binder in his hands. Without me even asking to see it, he thrusts the binder at me, and I discover that it is FILLED with all the fiction he's written for the last two years. Four hundred pages or something. And the reason he printed it all out (and used up an ENTIRE ink cartridge I might add)? To get onto the school newspaper. They asked to see some writing you've done. I think he's going for the whole "shock and awe" idea. Silly.