[Jenna Rose]: 150.Poetry.Fake Smiles

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Fake Smiles
^{Copyright © Jennifer Radford}

She gives everyone smiles... Fake smiles.
The kind of smiles that never reach her eyes.

She isn’t sober all the time... Not most of the time.
But it’s the only way she can get you off of her mind.

She’s lonely... But she feels safer that way.
Safer from all the games you used to play.

She sits at night... Thinking of suicide.
While trying to get the courage, trying to push her fears aside.

Curled up on the floor... She lays and cries
Her thoughts racing, remembering every word of all your lies.

She’s exhausted... But she’s dreading going to bed.
Because all she does is lay there, she can’t get you out of her head.

So she lays there and talks to angels... Not really knowing why.
Guessing that it’s because they’re there for her whenever thoughts of you make her cry.

Until she falls asleep... And dreams of you.
Dreams that she knows will never come true.

In the morning when she wakes... She lays there crying.
Not wanting to face the truth all around her, wanting to keep denying.

She finally gets up... And slowly gets ready to go.
Aching every moment, missing you so.

And to every one she sees... She tries to hide how she feels by giving smiles.
Fake smiles... The kind of smiles that never reach her eyes.

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