2006-05-22 iippo: Some typos here and there: 2006-05-23 Child of God: Thanks again for pointing out my typo's. I'm really bad for them, even though I do proof-read all my work before I post. ^-^' 2006-05-23 iippo: Four eyes see more mistakes than two, that's what programmers always say. [Child of God]: 416.Poetry.Som
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Someday, people will close their eyes and use their hearts for sight.
Someday, the world will sprout out a new bud,
Someday, the land will be shared without the shed of blood.
Someday, we will live peacefully under one sun,
Someday, the people will stand united as one.
Someday, people will chose love and peace instead of war and hate,
Someday, we must change our destructive ways, before it's too late.
Line 1: "downt he", line 2 "thier" line 6 "smeday".
The rhyming is a really good emphasis (makes me think of John Lennon's peace-stuff).
At first readign I thought I'd say something like "it'd be good if there was somekind of 'when' or other relief in the end" but I'm not sure anymore if it's needed or even useful. The "before it's too late" is a very strong ending. I can imagine it being read out loud, the emphasis on the last word...