As part of our attempt at achieving some semblance of journalistic legitimacy, we at WC Monthly are pleased to bring to you a series of features as our own staff interviews WritersCo's populous, one unlucky victim at a time! What's more, through the magic of ridiculositism, each interviewee will display a certain trait chosen from a small selection for your entertainment.



Interviewee: [Font]
Interviewer: [Mister Saint]
Quirk: [Font] will be playing the part of himself as a crooked politician.




Mr. Saint: Thanks for sitting down with us today, Font, and for electing to be the first victim of WC Monthly's interview process. Do you have any opening remarks you'd like to make concerning... anything?

Font MP: No problem at all Mr. Saint, always glad to be of assistance and approachable by my constituents. Though as we had agreed, I assume we won't be discussing that situation you know, involving the you-know-what?

Mr. Saint: Of course, of course. Here at WC Monthly we adhere to the strictest moral standards, and never attempt to discredit the virtuosity of people who know where we live. Now, what do you say we get right into it? The first question on everyone's mind is, "What in the world were you thinking, inviting these maniacs to express themselves in an open atmosphere?"

Font MP: And I'm glad that you'd remembered that, being elected earned me the right to have access to those addresses. Well to the answer my good man, one would like to think that in today’s society everyone is free to express themselves when and how they please. Though between you and me, for every 'maniac' that I get over here gain me an extra bonus to help build by luxury spa and sauna.

Mr. Saint: It's often been said that people in positions of power are corrupted by that power. Why do you think this is true, or not true?

Font MP: Now, now, just because this title comes with a degree of authority and a big red button to destroy people doesn't mean we abuse them or even use them regularly. We wait until our pre-arranged sporting events, then we practice our rights to abuse powers and what not. It helps relax.

Mr. Saint: Answer the following questions as concisely as possible. 

You ask for a sweater for your birthday, and instead, your friend brings you a screamer. Do you...

A) Punch him in the head?
B) Lobby to have his gender banned?
C) Ask the magic eight ball for advice?
D) Insinuate that his mother's promiscuity knows no end?

Font MP: Now I have to admit I have had each of those scenarios arranged for several different individuals. Although, as you may have guessed, the magic eight ball is at the centre of any political party. We rely heavily on its wisdom. How else do you think the all important decisions are made?

Mr. Saint: What's your favorite meal?

Font MP: Anything that someone has had to slave over for hours at minimum wage.

Mr. Saint:And now it's time for your closing remarks. If you had anything to say to the readers of WC Monthly, and we could print it without (expletive deleted) marks, what would it be?

Font MP: First and foremost it’s people like all you readers that makes people like me rich. You should all be proud of yourselves for your hard work, and dedication. Soon my mansion will have a fully equipped sauna and spa, and you will all be able to be proud of your accomplishments. Keep on at it folks, and spread the news! It’s for the best for us all.